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lyrics

Can I get a hot minute thinkin’ ’bout The Kid
Sittin' at the drums ‘bout to make me crazy
What would he like to opening on Christmas day
Hoping he likes what I get him either way
I know that Halo is his favorite gaming FPS
Crushing those noobs brings him joy in great excess
He may be young and lacking in experience
But he's a cool dude despite his clumsiness

Bright lights and the Cheeto dust settles
He loves to bring life to all that old metal
Late nights and empty soda cans
Partied so long he passed out in the van
What could he use to cut loose
Here's a pop quiz
Maybe some cheese whiz
What do I get the party guy
What do I buy to make him more fly

Place it in a box
Tape it all around
It’s not like it’s smallpox
This should be my playground
Complicated
Exhilarated
Anticipated
Nauseated
Can’t seem to find the right thing
For my friend the drum machine

Style
Fashion
Trendsetter
Rocks that microphone
Step to the side
Break it all down
I'm sure there's something clothes related
I can get for her wardrobe

Gotta grind it out
Make it loud
Crank it up
Deer themed underwear
Gun related socks
What could I get to take hunting
I know what I can do
I know what I can get
Craft supplies and some paper clips
Gonna MacGyver something good
That he’ll never forget

It’s all doom
Light is all gone
Missed my window
To get them something on Amazon

Why, why is it so hard to buy a gift
For a teen with some sick skill
I don’t want him to think I forgot
Every year it’s something new
Just a matter of which who
I could get him a decal that says “bands without drummers suck”

He’s a good brother and a friend
What could he use to see him through the bitter end
We’re at the age of practicality
But it must reek of brutality

credits

from My Life in a Mediocre Metal Band [Pt. 1 of 2] (Comedy Death Metal), released July 29, 2020
The Party - Lyrics and Vocals
The Style - Lyrics and Vocals
The Kid - Vocals
The Redneck - Vocals
The Mystery - Very Mysterious
Eero Tertsunen - Guitar Solo

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